There are plenty of LBI weddings hosted here each year. The stress of planning the big day can give happy couples a bad case of writer’s block. Take this helpful guide to the beach with you, so you can relax and get mentally prepared to write your LBI wedding vows. Soak up the sun and get started with this easy 5-day plan!
Channel the Nautical Magic of LBI Weddings
As you know, an LBI wedding is a perfect fit for beach-loving couples. If you and your partner were “born with sand in your shoes” as New Jersey locals claim, it’s no wonder you’re planning an LBI wedding. The scenery is perfect. The beach town layout is perfect. Everything is finally coming together.
One thing left on your to-do list is writing your wedding vows, but it’s not as serious as it sounds. Yes, you’ll be reciting this in front of a huge crowd. Yes, these words will mark the beginning of your new life together. But, don’t feel too anxious about it! Writing your wedding vows can be romantic and calming.
Before you begin, make sure you and your partner actually want to write your own wedding vows. You should mutually agree on this and feel genuinely excited
Follow our plan to write your wedding vows from start to finish in 5 days. Our advice is that you write them from a comfortable spot on the beach. Print this guide, grab a pen, and hit the sand! You’re not the first one to decompress on the beach before your big day. LBI weddings are fun and the views are serene. Get some sun and fresh air while you work on writing your wedding vows- and let yourself relax!
Before you begin your LBI wedding vows
Before you begin, make sure you and your partner actually want to write your own wedding vows. You should mutually agree on this and feel genuinely excited. If writing your own vows feels about as boring as filing your tax return, you should consider taking a traditional approach of reciting pre-written vows. There is no shame in going with traditional wedding vows if you and your groom would prefer not to write them.
Write your wedding vows in 5 days
If you choose to write your own wedding vows and make them more personalized, it’s time to get to it!
Day 1. Prewriting: Brainstorm with yourself
Reflect and make notes about each of those nose-scrunching, cute moments you’ve shared with your partner and the ones you want to have in the future. Before you get lost in la-la-land, put your thoughts into SAPF format. (Subject, Audience, Purpose, Form)
- Subject: What are you writing about? Why do you love them? What does this marriage mean to you? What will you vow? What do you appreciate in your partner? What do you wish for your future together?
Tip: Take time to really answer these questions. Reread them and cross out anything that is repetitive, off topic, or too deep to get into during this brief part of your wedding.
- Audience: Who are you talking to? Will your wedding vows be said privately to your partner or openly to everyone at your wedding? What jokes, details, and language are appropriate for this audience?
Tip: Cross out anything that could be embarrassing or too personal to share in front of everyone. If your first impression wasn’t great, don’t mention that. You really don’t need to insult yourself, either!
- Purpose: Why am I writing this? Is my partner making me? What am I trying to express? What message or feeling do I want to give this audience?
Tip: There are lots of reasons to write: to inform, persuade, entertain, and so on. Your main goal isn’t to make everyone laugh or cry. Make sure your primary purpose is to make a loving promise to your partner.
- Form: What style and format should we use? Also, how long should this be?
Tip: The maximum length should be no more than two minutes each. Make sure your delivery style is consistent to that of your partner. Whatever you choose to say, keep them similar in length and tone.
Day 2. Drafting: Put your ideas into sentences
Now you have some order to your web of ideas and you have discussed the approach and length with your partner. Try writing complete sentences in a loose structure. Just let your thoughts out on paper.
Tip: Don’t skip ahead or try to cram your drafting into Day 1. It’s better to give your thoughts some air, and come back to it after you’ve had a good night’s sleep.
3. Revising: Polish up your Wedding Vows
Revising is when you check for unity and coherence. You want your vows to be clear, connected, and to the point. Practice reading aloud, and time yourself. If you’re over the time limit, then you need to consider deleting sentences that are too repetitive, cliché, or off topic. If you’re comfortable, let someone else read your wedding vows and listen to their feedback. Make sure you can correctly pronounce everything you have written and get comfortable with a rhythm.
4. Editing: Check your Wedding Vows for Grammar
If you are going to print your wedding vows as a keepsake or have them engraved or published somewhere, you’ll definitely need to proofread and edit to make sure that everything is correct. Some couples like to have their vows printed onto a sign to keep in a frame in their new home. Even better, you can have a key part of your wedding vows engraved on the inside of your wedding bands!
Here’s a checklist to help you fix errors before it’s too late!
- I remembered to indent all of my paragraphs
- All of my sentences start with a capital letter
- I used capital letters on proper nouns
- I have punctuation at the end of each sentence
- I checked my words for correct spelling
5. Publishing: How are you going to present this?
By this final step, you should be satisfied with the words you have constructed for your wedding vows. Now it’s time to decide when in your LBI wedding ceremony the vows will be recited and how you will recite them. Will you recite them by memory or using notecards? You might decide to actually publish your wedding vows in something like a memory book or digital video.
Tip: The best time to say your wedding vows is just before you exchange rings. Using note cards can alleviate the stress once you’re in front of an audience. Make sure your photographer/videographer knows when your vows are in the ceremony line up so they can capture that moment up close.
Write your wedding vows like a rock star!
Remember, these are your wedding vows. There are no rules, just suggestions to help make the most of your time, your words, and your sanity. Try not to get too lost or caught up in the thousands of sample wedding vows out there. Don’t allow writing your wedding vows to stress you out because you feel like you need to impress everyone- you can wow your guests with great hotel accommodations and delicious food at your reception. Wedding vows are first and foremost written for your partner. Make your goal about sincerity and clarity.
According to one of the most charming and unpredictable brides, honest and direct is a great approach. Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City: The Movie struggled with writing her wedding vows, only to famously deliver a simplified phrase: “I will love you…and that is enough.”